Five Steps That Will Prime You to Hear from God (But You Might Only Be Doing the Last One)

Also, at the end of this email, there’s a free downloadable prayer template you can use next time you want to hear from God about a decision that matters to you.

Jun 03, 2025

Even if you want to hear from God and believe that you have a God who personally guides people like you, sometimes it feels like nothing happens when you actually ask him for guidance—especially if you’re new to all this.

You’re praying, “God, give me some guidance.” Or, you have your journal open and a pen in hand, asking, “Alright, God, tell me what to do.” Or, you even try Eli’s suggestion to Samuel, “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.”

Then, silence.

So, you try again, change up the words, say them louder or softer or just in your heart, and listen as well as you can, but still nothing. Eventually, you just give up on the possibility of hearing from God and walk away in frustration.

Has this ever happened to you?

For many people, the problem is that you’re starting with the last step in seeking God’s guidance and skipping at least four other steps that will ensure you are as ready as you can to be to hear from God.

Skipping these four other steps is like trying to cold start an old lawn mower.

When you start up a gas-powered lawn mower for the first time after winter, like I did just a few weeks ago, you’re probably going to struggle to get it going. Pull the cord all you want, but it’s not going to start. And, eventually, an old guy from down the street is going to tell you what you’re doing wrong.

So, what’s wrong?

To get a gas-powered lawn mower going, as my dad taught me the first time I ever mowed the lawn, you have to “prime” it.

Priming the engine moves gas manually to where it needs to be (or, at least that’s what a quick search told me)—setting up the engine for a successful start and increasing the likelihood that when you pull the cord something will actually happen. Then, once you get the engine going once, it will typically take a bit less priming next time as long as you’re using the lawn mower somewhat often.

That’s what learning to listen for God’s guidance for the first time, or even the first time in a long time, feels like. You’re pulling the cord as hard as you can, you’re praying the prayer with all your might, but nothing happens.

Maybe, all you need is a bit more priming.

The Five Steps (Including the Four Most People Skip)

Over the past few years, I’ve met with many people who, like you, want to hear from God about a decision that matters to them—but, before, we even start talking about how to use the H.E.A.R. Framework, I try to slow down and encourage five basic steps that will increase the likelihood that they’ll actually experience God’s guidance.

Doing these five steps primes you to hear from God so that by the time you actually ask for guidance, you’re in a better position to hear his voice if he speaks. Eventually these five steps become second-nature, but at first, they require intentional practice.

Can you hear from God without these five steps? Of course. Samuel did and so have many others.

You might think, “I don’t need these steps, I’ll just jump right in.” Go right ahead. You might experience God’s voice just like Samuel did.

But, as someone who has regularly skipped many of these steps in my own attempts to hear from God, I have found that while these steps might not be essential, they’re wise and helpful. These best practices are rooted in the advice of many different guides who have far more experience in hearing God’s voice.

Here’s a quick snapshot of these five steps, and, in the next few emails, we’ll unpack each of these steps in-depth.

Step One: Clarify Your Question

If you had to sum up what you want guidance about in one question, what would it be? Often, you’ll discover that the “presenting question” (kind of like the “presenting issue” in therapy) is just scratching the surface of the actual question you want to ask God. And, sometimes, you’re just asking the wrong question entirely. And, sometimes, you’re not sure what you’re asking at all. That’s why we’ll explore how to ensure you’re asking the right question and how to make it as clear as possible.

Step Two: Set a Deadline

Setting a deadline doesn’t mean saying, “God, you better speak to me by the stroke of midnight or I’m doing what I want.” It means accepting the reality that some decisions you face have hard deadlines that can’t be ignored—like applying to a university. Most people make the mistake of either setting a deadline that’s too soon or one that’s too far away and, in doing so, risking missing out on God’s guidance.

Step Three: Name Your Options

Yes, God will often tell you an option you hadn’t even thought of or considered, but start by naming the choices that come to mind. As we’ll talk more about, my recommendation is: list more than two but less than seven options. You might feel like that’s oddly specific and, even worse, like I’m setting some constraints on God, but, I’ll explain how I believe this helps you avoid the pitfalls of both “narrow-framing” and the “paradox of choice.”

Step Four: Pray for Indifference

There’s a good chance that, before you ask God for guidance about a decision you’re facing, you already have a preferred option. That’s why Ruth Haley Barton encourages people to practice praying for indifference—to be indifferent, she says, to anything but God’s will (like Jesus did in the Garden of Gethsemane). Sometimes, in the end, as we already explored, personal preference and obedience to God align, but sometimes they don’t—and, the prayer for indifference primes you for that possibility.

Step Five: Ask for Guidance

This is the step that most people start with, but it’s really the last step in the process of preparing to listen for God’s voice. In this step, you’re actually making the ask—asking God, through his Holy Spirit, to guide you where he wants to lead you. It’s saying something like, “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.”

The Five Steps in One Prayer Template

Once you’ve taken these steps, instead of simply saying, “God, speak to me,” you’re primed to hear from God and you’re ready to use the following prayer template to prepare to hear his voice:

Father, I’m facing a decision and I want your wisdom.
In particular, I’m asking: [insert question here].
Here’s a few of the options I’ve thought of so far: [insert options here]. But, I am open to other options you might have in mind that I haven’t even considered.
I’m hoping to make a decision by [insert deadline here]—even while understanding that you don’t always operate according to my timeline.
My preference is [insert preference here], but I’m asking you to make me indifferent to anything but your will in the end—even if it's not my preference.
Please guide me into what you want.
Come, Holy Spirit.

In the comments, let me know: Which step are you looking forward to hearing more about, and why?