How to Ask for God’s Guidance

The problem with asking for God’s guidance without expecting it and expecting God’s guidance without actually asking for it.

Jul 08, 2025

As part of Hear from God in 40 Emails (or Less), we’re exploring the five steps that will prime you to hear from God: 1) Clarify the Question, 2) Set a Deadline, 3) Name Your Options, 4) Pray for Indifference, and 5) Ask for Guidance.

My kids are always asking me for things.

A few days ago, they asked me for the candy that a relative gave them. Yesterday, they asked for a Lego set that’s in the attic. This morning, they asked for breakfast. Then, they asked for a different breakfast.

They ask because I’m their dad, and they know I have the power to give them what they’re asking for—or withhold it from them if I think it’s for the best.

This might feel obvious, too obvious to dedicate a whole email to explaining, but the final step that will prime you to experience God’s guidance in your life is actually asking for it. And, it’s easier than you might think to get this step wrong.

Expecting God’s Guidance Without Asking for It

You might be expecting God’s guidance but failing to actually ask for it.

James, the half-brother of Jesus, opens his letter to a church by encouraging people like you and me to actually ask God to guide them. He writes, “Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God—who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly—and it will be given to him” (James 1:5).

It’s similar to what Jesus said, “Ask, and it will be given to you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7)—a principle that, according to James, can be applied to asking God not just for provision or protection but guidance at whatever fork-in-the-road you find yourself.

He’s reminding us that God is already primed and ready to give guidance to you. He isn’t a God who loves to withhold the word of guidance that you desperately long for. He isn’t a God who only gives his wisdom to the select few people who deserve it. He’s a God who is just waiting for you to ask.

But, sometimes, we forget to actually ask.

James says later, which he probably also felt was too obvious to dedicate a portion of his letter to explaining, “You do not have because you do not ask” (James 4:2).

There’s plenty of moments in my life when I’ve been disappointed that God didn’t give me the guidance I was expecting him to give me—until I realized that I never took a moment to actually ask him for it.

It’s often right after I made a bad decision, and I’ve felt, “God, why didn’t you steer me in the right direction?” You didn’t ask, I can almost hear him say.

But, asking is only half of it.

Asking for God’s Guidance Without Expecting It

You also have to expect him to give you what you ask for.

That’s why James also writes, “But let him ask in faith without doubting. For the doubter is like the surging sea, driven and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord, being double-minded and unstable in all his ways” (James 1:6-8).

You might still have your doubts that God actually speaks to people like you. Or, you might be wondering if the question you’re facing is even worthy of God’s guidance. Maybe, you’ve felt like you tried asking God something once before but he didn’t say anything, and you’re not sure if you want to try again.

These kinds of doubts, as real as they are, will often leave you expecting God not to speak to you, even if you ask him—and, if what James is saying is right, it’s destined to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Expect God not to guide you, he’s saying, and you probably won’t receive any guidance. If you’re asking God to guide you but there’s a Plan B in the back of your mind for when he doesn’t, it’s actually your Plan A.

Remember how my kids always ask me for things? They also expect me to give them what they ask—even if they asked for the same thing yesterday and I didn’t give it to them. They know my generous nature, as inconsistent as I am, and they hold it against me.

God is waiting for you to ask, but it’s not enough to just use all the right words—or even a template like the one we’ll review in a moment. He’s ready to give wisdom to people who are asking with expectation. If you expect to hear from God, it’s more likely that you will.

As Jesus says, if even average parents like me know how to give my kids what they ask for, how much more will God do that for you? (Luke 11:11-13)

Try Asking God for Guidance With This Prayer

In a previous email, I introduced a prayer template you can use when you ask God to guide you about a decision that matters to you. Once you’ve clarified the question, set a deadline, named your options, and prayed for indifference, you’re primed to use this template and actually ask God for his guidance and expect to receive it.

Let’s unpack it line-by-line. Then, I want you to try it.

Father, I’m facing a decision and I want your wisdom.

Starting here reminds you who you’re talking to. He's a generous father who, as we explored in the email about how God is like a free-range parent, is ready to give you as much guidance as is helpful.

In particular, I’m asking: [insert question here].

Get it down to one-sentence that’s not too vague, too big, too shallow, or too soon. God knows what you’re trying to ask, but it’s helpful for you to be 100% clear on what you’re trying to ask.

Here’s a few of the options I’ve thought of so far: [insert options here]. But, I am open to other options you might have in mind that I haven’t even considered.

If possible, list more than two but less than seven options. That will help you escape both narrow-framing and the paradox of choice.

I’m hoping to make a decision by [insert deadline here]—even while understanding that you don’t always operate according to my timeline.

Remember Parkinson’s Law and make sure your timeline isn’t too long, but also remember Hofstadter’s Law and make sure it’s not too short. Leave room for the possibility that your timeline isn’t God’s.

My preference is [insert preference here], but I’m asking you to make me indifferent to anything but your will in the end—even if it's not my preference.

Admit your preference from among the options (because you probably have one even if you don’t think you do), but then ask God to help you be indifferent to the options. You might need to pause here for a minute and consider anything that might be keeping you from being indifferent.

Please guide me into what you want.

Make the ask—with a heart full of expectation that he’ll answer.

Come, Holy Spirit.

When you’re asking for wisdom, you’re really asking for God to pour his Holy Spirit into you in expectation that the Holy Spirit will “guide you” (John 16:13) into what God wants. In fact, Jesus says the Holy Spirit is what God longs to give to those who ask (Luke 11:13). As Jon Tyson at Church of the City likes to say, “God comes where he’s wanted”—and so does his guidance through the Holy Spirit.

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Now, it’s time for you to try it.

Take a moment today or this week, fill in the blanks of this prayer, and give it go.

Then, keep reading these emails as we start to explore the H.E.A.R. Framework in-depth and consider some of the ways God might be guiding you without you even realizing it.

We’re just getting started.